6 Ways to Help a “Picky Eater” with Eating Away from Home

It’s normal for kids to have foods they dislike. Who doesn’t have their favorite foods? But for some kids, food preferences go beyond simply “picky eating.” For children with sensory aversion or other feeding difficulties, eating meals when they’re not at home can be a real challenge.

Read on for some practical tips to help your child more easily eat at school, at a friend’s or relative’s home, or anywhere else.

Why is eating away from home challenging for some kids?

Eating meals away from home can be tough for children with feeding difficulties. There are a few reasons for this. 

Home is your child’s most familiar environment. So when they’re eating in the school cafeteria, at a restaurant, or at Grandma’s house, it’s normal for this to feel different. There are all kinds of new things to take in: loud noises and voices in the cafeteria, a crowded table at a restaurant, or new smells from other people’s food. This can cause kids, especially picky eaters, to feel less comfortable eating.

In addition, at home, children may be used to having as much time as they need to finish a meal. When they’re at school or a restaurant, they typically have to eat more quickly. A rushed mealtime can be stressful and overwhelming for kids. They may not eat as much as they usually do. 

6 tips to help your child eat away from home

The American Speech-Language Hearing Association (ASHA) provides expert tips to help your child eat at school. Much of this can be applied to any place your child eats.

1 Practice eating together

If your child needs to eat a certain amount of food in order to feel good, or if they need to eat a greater variety of foods, it’s important to practice these goals together in the comfort of home. Try new foods together. Talk about them and what they look like or feel like. Make sure to provide a “model” and eat the new food yourself. A parent model is extremely motivating for kids to try a new food.

2 Have your child help plan and prepare meals

Whether your child is bringing their lunch to school, summer camp, or any other outing, let them help you make it. This way they’ll know what to expect when they open their lunchbox.

Grocery shopping is another excellent way to help your child get familiar with the food they’ll be trying that week. Plan your shopping at a time your child can come with you, and give them choices you are comfortable with. For example, let them pick out the type of chicken tenders they want to try, or the type of bread for their sandwiches.

3 Send preferred foods when you pack a meal

If your child is very selective and has difficulty with new foods, don’t send totally new foods when they’re away from home. It’s important to send foods you know your child will eat and get full with. Of course, you can try new foods together at home, but don’t send newer foods until your child is eating them well at home.

4 Ask your child for information, but don’t make it a big deal

When your child comes home without having touched their lunch, it’s normal to want to ask questions. Try to get information about how your child is eating, but don’t make it a stressful topic. You might say, “Tell me about lunchtime today,” “Is there anything you don’t like about your lunch?,” or “Is there anything hard about eating? What is it?” Listen to your child, and brainstorm with them about ways to address any problems they tell you about.

5 Find a fun lunchbox or water bottle

One simple thing to try: Let your child pick out a lunchbox, water bottle, or any other eating utensils that’s motivating to them. This might be a lunchbox with their favorite TV character on it, or a cup that’s their favorite color. These might seem like small things, but they can make mealtimes much more fun–and perhaps even less stressful.

6 Talk to the staff or adults in charge

It can help to tell the adults your child will be with about their eating challenges. You can say something like, “My child gets overwhelmed in a loud room. If you notice they seem upset, would you mind checking in with them?” or “My child has a hard time finishing a meal quickly. Do you mind letting them know about 10 minutes before lunch is over?”

Now, this won’t always be possible in every situation. But it’s a good idea to keep other adults or school staff in the loop. In addition, if your child is receiving feeding treatment, they may be able to have accommodations for mealtime put into their IEP.

How do you know if your child needs feeding therapy?

Is it just picky eating, or is something else going on? When a child has severe negative feelings or reactions toward certain foods, or if they eat a very limited diet, sensory issues could be to blame. This is known as sensory food aversion or sensory feeding disorder. In these cases, feeding therapy can be a big help.

There are symptoms of sensory feeding disorder to look for. Kids with sensory aversions to food may show the following behaviors:

  • Seem grossed out by looking at a new food on their plate 

  • Feel uneasy from the smell of a new food

  • Refuse to try or eat much of certain kinds of flavors, like savory, spicy, etc.

  • Dislike certain textures, such as the texture of meat or anything juicy or stringy like fruit or vegetables

  • Gag often

  • Cover their mouth or nose and refuse food

  • Spit out food

  • Show general negative reactions or anxiety around eating and mealtimes

Sensory aversions can look different in different kids. Some children may have many types of sensory aversions, and some may have just a few. Some children may show big reactions to foods they don’t like, while others may be more quiet in their refusals. No matter the severity of a food aversion, we want kids to be able to eat a wide variety of foods, as well as an adequate amount of food.

There are other types of feeding difficulties related to safety and skill with eating or drinking:

  • Some children have trouble with sucking, eating from a spoon, chewing, or drinking from a cup.

  • Some children have a swallowing disorder, called dysphagia. They have difficulties with moving food or liquid from the mouth, throat, or esophagus to the stomach.

Feeding and swallowing disorders are often related to other medical conditions, but they can also occur without a known cause. 

For kids who are at risk for choking or aspiration (when food or liquid falls into the airway), feeding therapy is necessary. Here are some signs of aspiration to watch for: 

  • Coughing while eating or drinking

  • Reddening of the eyes while eating or drinking

  • Teary eyes while eating or drinking

  • Gurgly or wet-sounding voice during or after eating/drinking 

  • Gagging 

  • Choking while eating or drinking 

It’s important to speak with a speech therapist if you notice any of these problems in your child.

What happens during childhood feeding therapy? 

The goal of feeding therapy is to improve a child’s ability to safely eat as many foods and liquids as possible. Here’s an overview of how feeding therapy works.

Sensory feeding therapy

For children who don’t eat enough food or different types of foods because of sensory issues, sensory feeding therapy focuses on increasing volume and food variety. The speech therapist will help the child decrease their sensory aversions or negative responses to foods. Some ways to do this include: 

  • Playing with non-preferred foods

  • Food chaining, which means targeting new foods that are similar to foods the child likes

  • Child-led interactions with food

For example, playing with food can help the child get used to interacting with the food before eating it. The speech therapist may walk the child through steps working up to taking a bite, such as smelling, touching, kissing, then licking the item. The speech therapist will observe the child’s reactions in order to determine when they appear ready to try eating the food item.

Therapy for feeding safety

If feeding safety is of concern, therapy will focus on finding foods and liquids the child can safely consume. Modification of foods or liquids may also be considered. This might involve mashing foods to get them to a softer consistency, or adding thickener to liquids to make them easier to manage.

Feeding therapy may include oral-motor exercises to increase a child’s strength and coordination, which then increases their safety when eating. As an example, some children may have poor jaw strength and need therapy in order to be able to chew adequately. 

Find a speech therapist for feeding therapy 

If your child is dealing with feeding problems, it’s important to talk to your pediatrician. They can help you find a speech therapist who specializes in childhood feeding treatment. You can also begin researching feeding therapists or practices. It never hurts to reach out and ask some initial questions. 

Expressable provides online feeding therapy to children of all ages. You can schedule a free consultation call to speak with one of our specialists and get your questions answered. Remember, the sooner your child has a feeding evaluation, the sooner they can begin getting the support they need!

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